Many people write to me and ask me how they can use the law of attraction to manifest their ideal love partner. Many have been hurt in past relationships and don’t want to re-create the same pain again with a new partner. Until I successfully manifested MY dream partner, I had no idea that there was a critical step in the manifestation process that I had been missing for years.

The fundamental step in harnessing the law of attraction is called many things, but for today I call it Setting intentions. To manifest the partner of your dreams, you must first write (yes, you should write it down) a laundry list (or “wish list”) of qualities and characteristics that would best describe your ideal partner. Now here’s the rub: You need to write things that are CLEAR and SPECIFIC.

It’s okay to include traits like honesty and integrity. But it also includes things that are more specific. For example, when I was manifesting my dream partner, James, my laundry list looked like this:

– gorgeous

– 5 feet 8 inches to 5 feet 10 inches tall (ideal to be my figure skating partner)

– athletic and fun

– able to skate as well as me

– we look fantastic on the ice together

– affectionate – likes lots of hugs and kisses

– likes to give massages

– likes to cook (since I didn’t like to cook)

– useful around the house (likes to chop firewood)

– he likes to take care of me

– spiritual

– enjoy personal growth

– likes to go to personal growth workshops

do yoga with me

– he likes children and would be a great father

– you have to move here since I don’t want to move

See how specific I was in a lot of ways? It took me months to get more and more specific as I learned from every relationship I was involved with in the interim. And guess what? I obtained everything I asked!

Here’s the other thing you need to know. When you’re creating your laundry list and can’t decide what you want, it can help you remember what didn’t work in past relationships and then ask for the opposite. For example, if your previous lover was a poor listener, ask for a patient listener in your ideal partner. I do not want you to do it focus on what you don’t want because the law of attraction states that what you focus on grows. However, acknowledging what you don’t want can sometimes be a springboard to being clear about what you do want. make want.

The mistake many people make when wishing for their ideal partner is being too lazy. The reason people are lazy is often because they don’t believe they can actually manifest what they TRULY want. That happened to me when I was trying to manifest my dream partner for the first time. She wanted both a figure skating partner and a love partner, but she didn’t think she could have both in one person. Why? Because I knew almost every man in figure skating who could skate in pairs and none of them were suitable. But one night, I had an intuitive “hit” that I needed to ask for what I REALLY wanted, not what he thought he could get.

Therefore, I changed my list to the one you see above. Not long after, James and I met. It has been a divine union ever since!

You CAN have anything you ask for. You must know yourself well to be clear about what you want. So guess what? Whatever qualities or traits your dream partner has (honesty, integrity, courage, independence, etc.) should also be resonating within you. Why? Because the law of attraction states that “like attracts like”, so you can’t attract someone with qualities you don’t have.

Just to reiterate: The first step to harnessing the law of attraction is to make your “wish list” as detailed as possible. Don’t worry about HOW you are going to manifest the partner of your dreams. The “hows” are in the domain of the Universe. By the way, The Universe found my ideal partner who wasn’t even a figure skater, but an aggressive in-line skater! James is now an amazing figure skater and we won a national gold medal in our first competition together! Do you see how creative the Universe can be?

Make your list and refine it as you learn more about yourself. One of my colleagues, Sandi Sain, who is a relationship and sex therapist, went on 500 dates before finalizing her “bucket list”! You can listen to the interview with Sandi Sain on my Blog Talk Radio show…

When you have taken the first step to manifest the partner of your dreams, stay alert! Because soon you will receive messages from The Universe that the couple of your dreams is on the way!